Reddit has made me realize how unoriginal my thoughts truly are

No text found

The bigger the tattoo of a cross, the less the person acts like a Christian.

No text found

I am more comfortable talking with newer friends because they are familiar with the newest incarnation of me and hold less expectations.

"You've changed maannn!"

If we're all actually living in a video game, whoever's playing as me better fucking get better at this game

No text found

In the last four days "Grab them by the p***y" has been said more times than all the other days in history, combined.

No text found

The oldest person alive on Earth is also the first person alive out of 7.4 billion people.

No text found

I have two cushions. My wife bought them. Their sole reason for existence is to throw the them on the bedroom floor at 11pm every evening.

No text found