If Hallmark sold "you park like shit" cards, they'd probably make a fortune.

Front: "Congratulations!"

Inside: "You park like an asshole!"

Front: "Just wanted to say how much I love your parking..."

Inside: "And by 'love,' I mean 'fucking despise.'

Front: Let me truthful, let me be blunt...

Inside: From this certain angle, you park like a cunt.